I frowned at the numbers. “Huh. Well, that’s higher than expected, but I can get those down. I’ll join an aerobics class!”
The doctor blinked. “Ah, no. That’s not how this test works. These results indicate several severe personality disorders. You can’t get rid of those by exercis-”
“You’re right! No time like the present!” I exclaimed, leaping to my feet and flailing my limbs wildly. “One, hy-yah-yah! Two, hy-yah-yah! Come on, doc, count with me! Three, hy-yah-yah!”
He never did give me a lollypop. 😦
For Mike Carver on twitter, who generously donated to my Do It In A Dress fundraising page to help raise money to send women in Sierra Leone to school.
Since he donated over $15, Mike got to request something for me to do in my dress. He requested: Daggy dancing.
I’m not saying this is definitely the coolest video on Youtube, but it’s hands-down the best one featuring me dancing to Die Antwoord in a school dress for charity.
If you’d like to suggest something similarly amazing for me to do, and help give a girl in Africa an education, donate $15 or more here:
Do It In A Dress
So I’m bad at taking care of myself, okay? I eat too much food or I don’t eat anything at all, I don’t buy new clothes unless they have physically fallen apart in some area that covers my bum or breasticles (frayed and holey cuffs are fine because who even looks at those anyway?), I don’t take the multivitamins concerned friends and family buy for me because I forget and also they taste like potpourri, I stress myself until I either faint or fall asleep in the middle of the day for 14 hours, I never start Uni assignments until the day before they’re due, and my toenails have needed clipping for like three days and I still haven’t done it.
I’m really bad at being a competent grown up.
The worst part, in the sense that it seems to bother my longsuffering loved ones the most, is my disinclination to ever see a doctor. I like to think of it as an adorable quirk! You can too.